Gilliard and Company began serving families in Fall 2020. The CEO, Whitney Gilliard, defined Gilliard and Company as a 501c (3) nonprofit that focuses on ending the foster care to homelessness pipeline as well as serving other resources including trauma intervention and essential support services for individuals and families in the foster care system.
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Gilliard said she has been in the system and she knows what it’s like. She said she also knows what it’s like to be marginalized and to feel like someone’s service project, so G&Co is very intentional in making sure that’s not the case for the young adults who join their program.

​“We are very genuine in what we do, and I am a firm believer in lived experiences,” Gilliard said. “You can’t necessarily reach people unless you truly have been in their predicament, and I believe that, along with our genuine intentions, is truly what captured the heart of our community.”

Gilliard said when people think of foster care, they generally do not think of quality, and a value of G&Co is to ensure that their young adults do not have less than quality experiences. “One thing we never, never, ever waver on is the quality of care that we give to them,” Gilliard said. “It doesn’t matter how expensive; it doesn’t matter how out of the way; it doesn’t matter how inconvenient — they deserve it and we stand firm on that.”

Gilliard said that she wants young adults to feel hope for their future when they work with G&Co.

​“I hope that Gilliard and Company emulates that we are the most hopeful place on earth,” she said.

Gilliard said for G&Co to have won Best Nonprofit Organization in the ‘Best of Savannah’ means the community sees what the organization is doing and stands right behind them. The CEO said she feels the acknowledgement is less of an accolade and more of the community speaking back to the organization.

“I feel like getting this award is the entire community of Savannah looking at us saying ‘keep going, keep doing your work, keep pushing,’ and ‘we’re here for you and we’re standing after you,’” Gilliard said. “That’s the message that we received and it is very encouraging.”

THE ARTICLE FEATURED BELONGS TO CONNECT SAVANNAH 
WRITTEN BY: BRANDY SIMPKINS

Side effects include mirroring what normalcy in others around us looks like, then carry ourselves as such because we are responsible for raising ourselves, yes, this is a side effect for the young and old.
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The side effects are clear but not one understands how to help. Another symptom of foster care is that we, who grew up in the system become test subjects and sacrificial lambs for the sake of “awareness”. A side effect is that we in many regards are willing to feel the triggering pain so others won’t have to. The medicine of foster care to the world is our stories. So we constantly sacrifice our own mental health to spread the warning and heed others to protect children from being subjected to this condition. 

Living with the condition of foster care feels like a lifelong fight for a cure.


Story can also be found: B Lifestyle Magazine, by Barry Farmer 
Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional Disclaimer – As a certified life coach, behavior aide, and trauma informed human service professional, I am only certified to help you with things that you personally have control over.

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Deborah Harris knows firsthand the importance of obtaining housing and life skills for young adults close to aging out of the foster care system.
Harris, 18, is getting that help and more from the Pooler nonprofit Gilliard & Company Independent Living Program.
G&Co provides housing and life skills for youth opting to remain in foster care at age 18 until their 21st birthday. Challenges young adults face if they exit foster care right at 18 are homelessness, sex trafficking, jail imprisonment, substance abuse and death by suicide or homicide.
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G&Co provides a much-needed way for young adults to transition into independence and self-sufficiency after foster care. 
G&Co ILP provides all expenses for apartment-style housing complete with rent, utilities, groceries, furniture, access to extracurricular activities and more for ages 18 to 21. G&Co staff assist each young adult in seeking higher education, as well as connect them with employers. 
“I love this program,” Harris said. “It’s more than just a place to live. They are here for you whenever you need them. I think of them as family.”  
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The Georgia Division of Family & Children Services placed Harris in a group home in Brunswick when she was 16. She landed there after suffering years of trauma living with her family in Atlanta. She also was sexually assaulted by an acquaintance at age 16, an event that causes her to continue to have panic attacks today.
Harris didn’t know how she would ever be able to live on her own, gain job skills or even learn to drive when she left the group home. 
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Enter G&Co, which is providing Harris with a rent-free apartment with a roommate in Georgetown, groceries and life-skill lessons like financial literacy. She’s enrolled in an online nursing program to become a registered nurse and looking forward to starting driving courses to obtain her license. Her grandparents might buy her a car, Harris said.

Harris also is in therapy, trying to work through the trauma she’s suffered.

What gets her through her struggles? She thinks about the strong person she wants to be for her 5-year-old half-brother who lives in Ohio. 
“I have been through so much, but I wouldn’t change a thing about my life because it’s made me who I am today,’’ Harris said.

Feels like familySince becoming providers in July 2019, G&Co has had 11 young adults enter the independent learning program, all at various times. 


While providing imperative services for young adults in foster care, G&Co is now asking the Pooler community for help. 


The G&Co ILP site is currently in an apartment community in Georgetown. They’re actively looking for an apartment community in Pooler, where their office is, to move the program to this summer.


“Our program is considered a scattered site being that G&Co does not have a residential facility,’’ said COO and ILP Director Marisa Pierce. “It's important to be in and among the community that is or as close to normalcy outside of care. What better way to teach and transition our young adults into an apartment of their own that they can successfully lease and maintain than by already living in one?”



G&Co beginningsWhitney Gilliard is a product of the foster care system herself, having lived in 18 placements while in foster care, giving her insight into the lives of children and adolescents in foster care and into the foster care system. She is also a survivor of child abuse. Whitney entered congregate care at the age of 14 and wasn't taken in by a foster home until age 17.



She and Maurice have a son, Aemon. They are devoted to stopping the cycle of child abuse and abandonment. The Gilliards are advocates for fostering and adopting.


No wonder Harris has found the independent learning program the Gilliards founded to be so welcoming. Harris said that after she told Whitney Gilliard of the panic attacks she has, Gilliard told Harris she can call her anytime, even 2 a.m. 

“That’s what family does,’’ Harris said.


Foster care affects everyone. Anyone can be one financial, physical, mental or emotional crisis away from being affiliated by the care system in some way, Pierce said. 


“The more recognized this is, the more you can become involved and help,” Pierce said. “We — foster care — are here in the community and it can only take community to better the system and help those in care thrive.”

Story Source: 
Help 18- to 21-year-olds in foster care find housing in Pooler (savannahnow.com)

Contact Anne Hart at anne@southernmamas.com. Follow on Instagram at southernmamas. 

Rosemary Wright, I lived with my parents first before meeting Esther. Through my parent's support, I was able to graduate high school and transition into Virginia's Independent Living Program  
This is my mother, Mrs. Rosemary Wright. It took me 17 years to find her and I am so grateful for her. My mother was the woman who remained steadfast in my life no matter my shortcomings and mistakes. She was always loving and forgiving. My mother always has room for others at the table. My mom is currently retired from The Pentagon. Both my parents always have their doors open for any youth from foster care that may need their company during the holidays. 

Question from Katrina, nsoro​ Scholar in Atlanta 

1. Who were their greatest positive influences growing up?
My greatest positive influences growing up were also my negative influences.  Most of the stories I was told growing up from my mother contained horrific stories of poverty and abandonment.   As one of 10 children, I had a vague idea of want and being always a little on the hungry side.  To hear stories of women (my grandmother “Nana”) who were left alone and without money while being responsible for a child instilled in me a fear of hunger and poverty.  My mother would state that her husband “my Dad” had money because they always had milk in the icebox “refrigerator.”  My mother would also say that when she was an adult she was always going to make sure there were milk and bread in her home.

2. Do you have a favorite female author or philanthropist? 
I loved Jane Goodall then and still do.  Hers was the kind of life that I dreamt about – wilderness, animals, nature, Africa.  One of my most prized possessions is an autograph of Jane in her book.  The day I met her following a lecture in Washington, DC, I waited in a very long line to acquire the signature.  I had teared up throughout the lecture and as I finally stood in front of her, I sobbed.  She looked at me and appeared a little perplexed.  All I could say is that I had always known her name and that she was wonderful.  I was awestruck.  She is an activist still doing incredibly important work – taking care of others, some of our close relatives. 

3. What motto did you raise Whitney on, and is this the same motto you were raised on?
Children – all ages deserve respect and love.  Too many adults believe and behave like they are the only ones to be respected.  Not so.  I was not raised with an overabundance of respect.  But I always knew I should have been.  

Other foster care awareness questions... 

4. Why should someone foster teenagers? 
They should only foster teenagers if they have an abundance of time, energy, patience, love, financial stability, and a strong empathetic and forgiving nature.  I understand why money may at times be a part of this conversation, but it should remain the most minor of reasons to foster.  The focus of the money should be to help the child, not as a personal paycheck.  Teenagers are smart and they are able to detect someone’s motive.

5. How did you work through your daughter’s communication with her biological mother? 
Patience.  Everyone involved in a child’s life should respect all of the relationships, blood relatives, and truly anyone important in the child’s life.  Biological mothers also deserve respect and patience.  There are some people who may want to be a good parent, yet are not ready to assume all of the responsibilities.  It takes more than just a desire to be a good parent.  However, not all parents are ready to be responsible for a human being, especially one that is solely dependent on them for everything.

6. What would you change about foster care? 
I would hold biological parents more responsible for the conduct of a disorderly child.  In many ways, foster care is like a local fire department.  When there is trouble everyone must know where to turn for help.  I am not saying that there aren’t problems with Foster Care.  But, everyone, adults, and children, at times may need an organization to step in.  I may be able to put out a pan fire, but a house fire calls for professionals to be called in to help. 
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“Body of Missing ‘Cupcake’ McKinney found”, “Body of missing 5-year old Naveah Adams Sumter found”... 

Then there came my timeline... floods of posts to “hold your children a little tighter” and “I don’t know what I would do if this was my child”. The very same day when these headlines appeared, I was walking to pick my son up from school, I saw 2 children no older than both Cupcake and Navaeh walking home ALONE from the bus stop to their home. 

As I witnessed this, I couldn’t help but to feel my blood boil and my ears went red. Less than 72 hours, the nation fell devastated by the stories of these two little lives gone to soon... and in the most heinous way possible. Fresh off reading their stories and then witnessesing 2 preschoolers wander alone was very similar to the feeling of peeling the skin off your cuticle further and further back. It was painful and gut wrenching. 

Please Know: 
Yes, crime rates have gone down in the US since 1990s. However “crimes” have many categories, to a parent’s demise- human trafficking rates are rising 7%+ within the past 3 years in America. To capture a child into this vile circumstance, according to National Center for Missing and Exploited Children (NCMEC), children are often taken heading to and from school- in many cases non-relative abductors are more likely to grab their victims off the very streets they are walking on. As a mother writing this blog, I have high hopes that many will share this... because this is a plea to please hold onto you children ALWAYS. 

The family of the two sweet angels are mourning and grieving at the hallow sounds coming from their bedrooms, the cold clothes in the dressers that will never be worn again, and the silence of the floors where their little feet will no longer pitter-patter on.  Their stories are not just headlines or a hot topic. What happened to these two girls will be a haunting to their perpetrators, a devastating tragedy that’s not simply washed away, and a essence of distress that the families will feel for a very long time. 

There is no such thing as ever being “too-safe” for your children. At any given moment, the safety net that we take for granted (ie safe neighborhood, good people) can change with a blink of an eye. I cannot help as I read these stories to think “what happened within their last hours”. I pray no one reading this will ever have to wonder or think about the last hours of their child. 

Please don’t let abduction stories that you read on facebook or see on the news be the reminder for you to hold your child(ren) tight. Do it always, and if you see something not right- never underestimate your God given supernatural powers of parental intuition. Call the police and stand up for your (OUR) children. 

On this day, 8 years ago, I lost my father to liver cancer. I found out 4 days before he passed, and I had no idea how sick he truly was until I saw him.  

I received the news that my dad was ill from my case manager. She called me and my world fell apart. Even though I was in foster care and finally got placed with a beautiful couple who loved me very much... there was still a huge part in my heart that loved my father... very much. No matter the mistakes that he made, there was never a mistake grave enough for me to dismiss that he was the only parent I had. Good or bad. 

When I begged my social worker to see my father, it was impossible. My social worker wouldn't approve of a visit unless my foster parents were there. I screamed and cried, I felt cornered and powerless because the only person who held all my childhood memories, the only parent I ever had, was dying- and because I was a "foster kid", I couldn't even get my last visits with him alone. What else could he say that would hurt me more than his death? 

The time I found this out was the same time homecoming was happening. Life was happening, and I wanted so badly for everything to stop. On the day of my homecoming, I went to see my father in my homecoming dress at the hospital. It was the first time, in a very long time that I saw him smile back at me. I had been away from home for almost 5 years, every family visit was awful- and at the family court, he could barely stand seeing me. But this moment, he smiled at me and that was all I ever wanted. I felt for a moment, that he saw me as his daughter again. He turned to my foster parents, with barely an ounce of life left in him, he said to Bill and Rosemary, "take care of my Whitney".  

The next day at 7 am, I got a call from my brother, "Dad is gone". 

Like a toddler scared of the dark, I jumped out of bed and ran to my foster parent's room and cried, "my dad passed away". I distinctively remember that as they looked at me with worry and shock, they did not know how relieved I was that they were there in my life. 

As everyone rotated in the hospital and all my siblings took their turns to say goodbye, I couldn't remove myself from my father's bedside. I sat there staring at him, begging him to just wake up and smile back at me again. Despite the commotion happening, the room felt silent to me. There were no monitors beeping, there were no fluids dripping, there were no sheets rusting. 

Since I said my final goodbye to my father, I leave remnants of him in my life as a reminder of that smile that I saw. Maybe, he did want me back home after all. 

My father gave me a jade necklace when I was born. It's very special to me and on days where I am unsure or need to feel empowered, I wear it. Sometimes I sign my name in emails with "Lam" in it. Those are my simple ways to show that I will never forget my father. I choose to remember him for his strength, wisdom, and courage. I choose to forgive him. 

As my life in foster care continued, it felt that outside looking in, many forgot that I lost a parent while I was in care. My social worker kept talking about a case plan. My classmates still said, "at least you still have parents". I carried a lot of guilt with me when these things happen. Should I be happy that the person who contributed to my time in foster care has passed, and at least I still have parents? 

No one can ever fulfill the place of my father. There's no love that can every erase that he existed, and time won't take away the very breaths that he breathed into my walk of life when he was alive. All of that is ok.  

My foster parents are very much my parents today. They love me and adore me. My mom said to me the other day "your love is the sunrise", my dad always picks up when I call him. Still, they don't ever try to replace my father. His role, just like theirs- is sacred and irreplaceable. 

After his funeral, my family went to eat pho. Tonight, that is exactly what we are going to do. ​

When the swelling went down and the throbbing pain that made the room spun finally settled down, I looked at my wrists and said to myself, "well... here we go again". For the 3rd time I have been arrested and without hesitation the routine went as it has always went:
 
1. I fought the cop. 
2. They charged me with resisting arrest. 
3. My foster mom is crying. 
4. My case manager whose been pissed off at me for months now needs to find me another placement. 

Gosh, the cuffs feels cold... and have I been crying? I can't remember, my eyes feels tired... I wish all the talking would stop. 

3 months later after being released from "Juvie", I found myself in a residential facility at Riverside VA.  I stayed there for about 6 months. It wasn't fun, it's wasn't a "get well" retreat. I barely felt sun on my skin and I had to ask permission for the doors to be unlocked each time I had to use the bathroom. One day I was talking to a staff member about nonsense while I was watching TV. She asked me "what do you want to do when you get out of here?", I told her " I don't know maybe be a tattoo artist. She laughed a wholesome laugh and said "oh child, I don't know bout that". 

Throughout my years of growing up in the foster care system, I heard that very message but in different ways. Sometimes it's said with slang "nah, it aint boutta happen", sometimes it's more proper, " I think you will need to work on a few things first". I outgrew my desire to be a tattoo artist when I approached my college years and I was motivated by my father in-law to look into the field of social services. Even with a degree in my hand that says I majored in "Human Services" with a focus on Psychology, I still found myself handicapped in this world. The "oh child, I don't know bout that", still lingered in my head. 

I cannot tell you how often those words stopped me from doing the many things that I knew would help others. It supressed my speaking and my advocacy. After all, i'm just a delinquent from the sytem- and made life hard for everyone. How can I ever make a differerence? It truly felt that being associated with foster care has crippled me. The self-esteem and courage that comes with being a leader of charity was somthing that I never thought I would fathom to do. 

Secret: self-esteem and courage aren't the only traits that will change the world. It's your will... to all my brothers and sisters, honey- you already have that and then some. 

Today our foundation, Gilliard and Company carried our partner's donations (Comfort Cases) into the building of Chatham County DFCS. We will be launching a new program called HavINN™ that will help my little brothers and sisters cope in a peaceful place, no matter where they are in their foster care journey. No more sleeping in offices. A desk is not a place to rest your head. 

Who knew the kid who walked those same steps with no bags, would come back with over 3 carts worth..."Yes Child..but I did." 

As of last week, I felt like I walked the stage and received my diploma from "Hard Knocks University of Foster Care". 

We almost can't help it, it's only human... when we help others, it feels good to feel appreciated. But what if doors are slammed at your face, texts are ignored, and awful things are said about you? Last week I felt that about half the lives of children in foster care that I worked with truly hated my help... I was either too annoying, too direct, too kind, or not strict enough. Gosh- I even questioned myself and wondered if I was a bad person. 

So this entry is dedicated to all my foster parents, providers, child welfare workers, and anyone who is involved with children in the foster care system. It can be absolutely draining. If you're wondering if you should foster- please read this too, because this is the truth and you need to know. 

Last week one (out of a few of my children) absolutely could not stand seeing me. I didn't know what about myself made this kid so mad. I asked, and I was shunned... OUCH. I called and there was no answer. I felt so helpless and I wanted to know so badly what I did wrong. Did I say something that triggered emotions? It was eating me alive that something as simple as my presence made this individual so angry. So I gave it a few days before I reached out again, when I did, the text messages were short, and what I felt like were kind words were answered with "ok". 

I called my team immediately and I wanted to know what they observed that I didn't pick up. I went and re-read the treatment plan to see where I went wrong. Then I called my mom and she said: "it's not personal". Those words didn't feel very comforting because it felt truly personal... but she was right. 

As a teen, I gave my foster mother the hardest time. I couldn't stand her help and nearly every advice she gave me was ignored. When I think back on how last week felt, I couldn't help but realize why I was the way I was towards my foster mom. She was kind, she was selfless, she was loving, and she was always there. But she a was all the things that remind me of what my biological parents WOULDN'T give me... and for that, I was angry, hurt, confused, and ashamed. I couldn't respond to the "I love yous " because I felt guilty for saying that to someone other than my bio parents. The times when they showed me I was their entire world, made me scared because I was never that to someone before. I pushed my foster mom away the most because my mother left me as a baby... and if my own mother didn't see value in me, why does she?

Guys, it's not personal. It's trauma. 

Please don't feel discouraged when your child shows you anything outside of pure happiness to see you. There is a divine miracle that is being shined through you, that neither yourself or your kids can see right now. It takes time... years later my foster mom is the only person in the world that I want when I feel sick, afraid, or unsure. She took the time and just like planting roses to the ground... understanding all the thorns and care it will need... she did that to my life. That is what you're doing right now. I see your tired eyes and your aching heart, trust me... the roses will bloom. ​

Growing up in foster care... things don't mean the same to me, as it does for others who weren't affected by the system. 
Yes, I love pumpkin spice- the cool breeze (or as cool as it can get in GA), feels so nice. But the nostalgia isn't about the beauty of Autumn. My heart feels the most anxiety around this time of year. Around this time of year, when I was in foster care- I had the least visits, the saddest people around me, and there's this beating fear that Dr@NadineBurkeHarris talks about... 

Fall is not the same for a "foster kid". The wisp of the fall air is nearly a siren for us to start begging for homes and shelter to go to- because oh yeah, the campus isn't open all year for the ones with no family. It's an SOS for the kids who are lingering in care, wondering what type of cruelty we are going to be subjected to this year (being ignored by family members, devasting reminders, abusive words, becoming ostracized, etc). 
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So toast up with the pumpkin spice... here's to the ones like me, who felt the reaping of fall that reminded us of the times when love was just as bare as the branches on the trees. 

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